At the beginning of this school year, the reality that my final 180 days of youth were coming to an end began to dawn on me like a blue whale eclipsing the sun. In a metaphorical sense, I will be booted from the safety of my nest into the wild unknown that is (hopefully) college, left to fend for myself armed only with mediocre social skills, bad puns and whatever else I have learned in my years of primary schooling to become a fully-fledged human being. In a more literal sense, I’m turning 18 in about two months. As this metaphorical whale prepares to land on me, I have begun to scramble for ideas as to how I could lighten the blow.

To optimize what little time left I have in my nest, I began to make my bucket list for my final year of high school. In addition to finally going to Halloween Haunt at Great America and getting caught up on Silicon Valley, I want to be considered fashionable. Random, I know, but when your style thus far has been described as “bohemian” or “comfortable,” both of which I discovered to be nice ways of saying I look like I just got out of bed, you begin to wonder what untapped potential you’ve been missing out on. What is the point of following so many beauty and fashion bloggers on Instagram and YouTube if you never apply what they teach you? Thus began my dive into the wonderful world of 2017 fashion trends, which honestly made me feel more lost than hearing a teacher say the words “pop quiz.”

I feel like trends have begun to forego function for fashion. Exhibit A: tinted sunglasses, and I don’t mean the black ones. I’m referring to the wireframed yellow and pink lenses that are sold at Urban Outfitters. Apparently our generation decided we need filters on our faces 24/7, and yes, that includes nighttime. These “sunglasses” don’t actually provide any protection, leaving your retinas to face the full onslaught of UV rays, naked and afraid.

Another trend that has gained popularity is plastic. The material made sense during the 60s when outer-space was trending, but nowadays plastic clothing just makes me think of saran wrap on leftovers. I guess it was… innovative when the plastic was contained to the knees, but full plastic pants?

Dancers, Instagram models and Justin Bieber have made “hypebeast” fashion quite the trend, which I can appreciate; however, it took me a full hour after purchasing my first Adidas t-shirt to process that I’d spent nearly $60 on a plain t-shirt with a logo that looks like cannabis on it.  

At this point, I am waiting for fashion to revert back to 200 A.D. when people wore blankets and leaves.

Although I might not understand some fashion trends, that doesn’t mean that I don’t still enjoy experimenting with them. On a similar note, just because one person may not have the same taste in clothes doesn’t mean that those clothes won’t look good on a different person.

The fun in fashion trends is playing with different combinations of them until you find the perfect one for you. I personally haven’t discovered mine, but I look forward to experimenting with new trends as the year continues.

I don’t know if I will ever end up truly discovering my personal style, but even if I don’t, at least I will know I had fun trying.

Oh Whale.